Dude, my hands! They're like... HANDS!

Right now I'm sitting at the library not doing any work (as usual). I'm bored as hell, looking up anything I possibly can on the internet that has nothing to with Hispanic-American culture. Hopefully, the 20 minute presentation will just write itself and be ready for me by Wednesday.

In the meantime, though, I just looked at my hands and the experience was sublime to say the least. It was like I was looking at the first time; as if I had been born again. One would think that this shit only happens when you've taken a nice dose of acid (which I never have), but they would be completely wrong. Never had I seen something so profound, so thought inducing in my life.

How do they work?
Why do I have them?
Punching stuff?

THAT LAST ONE WASN'T EVEN A QUESTION!

SHUT UP!

I wouldn't even be able to write the pointless post had it not been for the bad-ass pussy punchers. I wouldn't be able to pwn n00bs in COD4; not Street Fighter IV, not Gears of War! That shit rhymed therefore it meant something more than just me procrastinating.

People! Look at your hands and adore them for they are gifts from the heavens; from the gods themselves! Gifts that we must use to better humanity. Or jerk-off. However you're feeling.